Perhaps it is the age factor that makes becoming more aware of life an unexpected experience that had been slightly neglected in our youth. Or perhaps we just have opened our eyes to the things that have needed to be seen when the life timing is ready. We never know what twists and turns arrive in just one day of our lives. In the fraction of a second our lives can be altered in ways unimaginable and our flight gets disrupted and cancelled and we have to set about making new routes and reservations to places unknown before that moment of change occurred.
The ascent to beyond the horizon starts the day we are born and we know that it will end one day, yet we are never ready to accept that final flight without a fight. It seems to me that the destinations that lead you to that final boarding call have swiftly passed by and you hardly catch the breath of reality before it is time for the final ascent into the hereafter.
With trepidation and hope for a new beginning someday you transfer over to a new plain of soul renewal. You will leave the precious memories of your existence on earth behind for those who loved you. They will remember the gift of your life energy beaming off their resonating body and will continue to draw happiness in the memory of what was.
Loss of a loved human and all its relationship content does not come without pain. In fact it is a brutal affair with emotions that emerge without a warning and reek havoc on your mind and body. Then, while that is happening, the shock debris cloud hovers overhead like a bad thunderstorm about to erupt and all the chaos and fears and unsettled emotions begin to rain down like a monumental flood. It moves you to emotional areas never known before and dumps you there and provokes you to walk on and dares you to try. Through the veil of tears, the watery vision seems unclear until you take the first step alone. Day by day and step by step the gathering of your shattered life begins to piece itself back together, with a bonding agent that is not bought in a store but was paid for in love, strength and hope for a happier tomorrow.
The passing of a friend evokes many thoughts of love, life and feelings. In the time of a life crisis, you will become the solid rock that someone will need to lean on until they get their footing and can redirect their life flight. It is with much sadness that I had to become even more aware of the loss of a life and the morbid twist of sobriety that a dear friend must endure with the exit of their spousal transition.
You can never test the strength of a person until the shadow of a death leaves a mark on their heart. Unfortunately this test arrives without notice and in one explosive moment the world once known, becomes a blurr and almost unrecognizable with the upheaval of all that was once known as normal. I can view from the distance the amazing ability to adapt to such an ordeal. I see into the forest while my friend seems lost in the trees. I know that a path will clear for the exit into the sunlight but the process of grief will take it toll on the heart strings that tug daily. The life that once was on both parts must now merge into memory and become the next act in the play of life that is still moving forward.
To me an obituary should not read of "what was and who they were" but it should speak mountains of the legacy left behind for all to be aware of. Information that could spark inspiration and hope for each other. If we speak of what was, it paints the picture that eventhough their physical presence is not with us they are no longer of importance. Their vast memories remain alive and will compel us to think of similarities that we may be privy to at a later date and compare their memory to use as a stepping stone toward each day of life.
If I think of his past, I can only envy his future. A future that we will never know on this plain of earth. We can only surmise of the pleasantries that will abound from the earthly strings that once held his soul here. He left behind the people who will move his memory forward and forever etch his name across the land he once walked on.
Should we be sad, yes for the moment, but in a selfish way but we must remember the joy that we once held by knowing him when life flowed through his body. The law was his choice of a life profession and now he will practice the law in a realm free of hurtful situations and crimes that have to be settled by a judge. The only judging to be done in this lawless realm will be to judge the good things that he left behind. Being quiet and modest as to who he was only allowed others to understand the integrity with which he stood his ground on. He held many surprises and allowed his destiny to play out with silent thoughts.
The people he will leave behind will eventually fall back into their daily routines and life will go on. Only now life will be viewed differently. Every waking day will be more appreciated and the things that once went unnoticed will be viewed with open eyes and a softer heart. The unseen law that he practiced while alive will be the unwritten law of a life who aspired to do the right thing in representing human rights. His case needs no judge, as he will view us all from a courtroom unlike any we will ever see on earth.
IN MEMORIAM TO: M T F